Three secrets about me:
1) Sometimes I get very, very frustrated that parts of my body ache and/or refuse to work right, usually because of age;
2) I miss cuddling more than sex; and
3) I still want to start an "old school" gay family, i.e., the kind in which all the members, who cross the generations are recruited into it.
Showing posts with label gay. Show all posts
Showing posts with label gay. Show all posts
Saturday, December 18, 2010
Sunday, October 3, 2010
The Six Who Only Saw Tens
I've been thinking about love, lust, sex and relationships. I wonder how much my desire for sex sabotages my search for love, and vice-versa.
If I didn’t want to find a relationship, I’d probably pursue sex with others more aggressively. Even at my age, it isn’t that difficult to find willing sex partners. However, the ones who seem interested in me for sex I intuit pretty quickly as being someone I wouldn’t want to date. Therefore 999 times out of a 1,000 I don’t even bother to hook up with them. I’m happy to receive the affirmation that comes with their flirtation/eye contact, but I really don’t want to put out the energy for such a small return.
On the other hand, I think if I let myself do without sex more I’d have more drive to find a partner. I take care of myself a little too aggressively, perhaps. As a result, most of what I see during the day I don’t notice. I suspect there are guys out there who would make good partners whom I never even notice. But do I have to go totally celibate to find them?
The fact is that I have no clue how to find a partner. The last three men with whom I had long-term relationships I met randomly. No one has successfully schooled me on how to meet good men for dating and relationships. Yet as I approach 50, this issue takes on greater urgency.
If I didn’t want to find a relationship, I’d probably pursue sex with others more aggressively. Even at my age, it isn’t that difficult to find willing sex partners. However, the ones who seem interested in me for sex I intuit pretty quickly as being someone I wouldn’t want to date. Therefore 999 times out of a 1,000 I don’t even bother to hook up with them. I’m happy to receive the affirmation that comes with their flirtation/eye contact, but I really don’t want to put out the energy for such a small return.
On the other hand, I think if I let myself do without sex more I’d have more drive to find a partner. I take care of myself a little too aggressively, perhaps. As a result, most of what I see during the day I don’t notice. I suspect there are guys out there who would make good partners whom I never even notice. But do I have to go totally celibate to find them?
The fact is that I have no clue how to find a partner. The last three men with whom I had long-term relationships I met randomly. No one has successfully schooled me on how to meet good men for dating and relationships. Yet as I approach 50, this issue takes on greater urgency.
Friday, August 20, 2010
Things I Have Enjoyed
A brief list of things I have enjoyed in the past (in no particular order):
1. Skateboarding (1987-1990)
2. Hiking (1970-present)
3. Co-facilitating a LGBT youth support group (1993-1994)
4. Reading (1968-present)
5. Being part of a couple (1997-2001)
6. Biking (1968-2005)
7. Being in higher education institutions (1979-1984, 1989-1991, and 2006-2008)
8. Making music (1973-1978)
9. Keeping a journal (1983-present)
1. Skateboarding (1987-1990)
2. Hiking (1970-present)
3. Co-facilitating a LGBT youth support group (1993-1994)
4. Reading (1968-present)
5. Being part of a couple (1997-2001)
6. Biking (1968-2005)
7. Being in higher education institutions (1979-1984, 1989-1991, and 2006-2008)
8. Making music (1973-1978)
9. Keeping a journal (1983-present)
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)